Is anyone else with me here? The twenties are a crazy time in life, as everyone says, a time of “discovery.” But when you’re a young woman, and you are not only trying to find your identity, but also trying to figure out if any of these crazy guys running around in your life is tied to your future, things can become quite complicated.
To put things bluntly and perhaps to be a bit cliché, I have lost my identity several times over the last few years. I have been swept off my feet by charming men far too many times (one would be too many, in my opinion), and have found myself re-shaping my future to fit into their futures. Instead of relentlessly pursuing my passions in missions, kids’ ministry, and foreign languages, I have accepted decent jobs in journalism that were accommodating to the men I imagined to be my future husbands (I am not a polygamist; you know what I mean).
But recently I have experienced a great awakening. Now four years out of college, God has reminded me of what I imagined myself to be doing before I left the safe haven of ORU: Ministering to kids in foreign countries, or maybe writing kids’ books here in the U.S. And while I’m thankful for the job I have now, I am allowing myself to dream bigger than I ever have before. Like Pastor Joel Osteen says, It’s not time to retire those dreams; it’s time to refire.
So instead of allowing other people to choose my destiny, I am taking control and trusting God, asking Him to lead me more clearly than ever before. And while I’m not expecting it to happen anytime soon, I know that as I travel on the path that God has for me instead of just trailing some guy in his path, God will bring me someone who is crazy for God and me, and vice versa.